


The Ideal

by couldyoonot



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Jooheon Is a Sweetheart, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-22 09:25:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17057147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/couldyoonot/pseuds/couldyoonot
Summary: When you meet your ideal man, you will do whatever you can to catch his attention. But what if your ideal man isn't the one meant for you?





	The Ideal

If there was ever an embodiment of your ideal man, it was the smiling man sitting across from you. His dark hair, tall stature, and fit body, paired with his quiet but friendly demeanor, was everything you had ever found attractive in a man. When his eyes looked over towards you and his mouth curled up into a toothy smile, you unwillingly smiled back without hesitation. You felt like you could look at him all day.

“Y/N!” Laura said loudly into your ear. This pulled your attention away from the god sitting in front of you and onto her face. She gave you a curious look and asked,”You okay? Jooheon is trying to ask you a question.” You then followed her eyes over to the dimpled boy who was already looking at you in wait.

“I’m sorry! I just got lost in thought. What did you need?”

“I was just asking what you think we should do the project about. We only have two weeks to complete the project so I think we should decide as soon as possible.”

Oh, yes. The project. You had almost forgotten the whole reason you were sitting in this cafe with these three. You were assigned as a group for an Astronomy project.

Instead of directly answering Jooheon, you looked across the table again and asked, “I’m okay with anything. What about you Shownu?” After a moment of thoughtful hesitation, he spoke, “What about the phases and orbit of the moon? I think they are fairly simple and will be easy to do research on.”

After a quick vote, all four of you agreed on Shownu’s idea. As the group continued to discuss the basics of the project, you kept finding your eyes on Shownu’s face. The way he intently listened and only spoke after a few moments of thought was so intriguing to you. You only knew how to speak whatever was on your mind, in what sometimes felt like it was far too drawn out for the message you were trying to convey. But Shownu, he seemed to know how to say exactly what he needed to say in the shortest and clearest way possible.

After a few more short discussions, the four of you split up to go home, deciding to continue the conversation the next day. On your walk back to the dorm, it didn’t take long for Laura to bring it up.

“Sooooo, what was up with that?”

“With what?” You asked, pretending you had no idea what she was talking about.

“Um, the whole googly eyes thing you were doing at Shownu?” She said with a hint of suspicion in her voice.

You had a quick thought of lying to her but you knew she would find out anyway so you confessed, “Laura, he is my perfect man.” You looked over at her with a big smile and continued, “I mean, he has everything I could ever ask for. Tell me, do you believe in love at first sight?”

“Pfft!” she laughed, “No, but I am guessing you do!”

“Not until just now.” You said wistfully, earning another laugh.

“Listen, I am not saying that it’s not real, just be careful with your heart okay? You are too precious to be throwing your love to any guy that has a charming smile.”

\----------------------

“Jooheon!” You yell out when you saw him walking across the quad.

The night before, you and Laura realized that you hadn’t exchanged numbers with the boys in your group to continue your project.

When Jooheon looked over at you jogging toward him, you gave him a small wave. This caused him to return your gesture with an adorable eye-smile and a wave of his own. As you got closer he asked, “Hey Y/N, what’s up?”

“Hey,” You say slightly out of breath, “I realized that we forgot to exchange numbers yesterday.”

“You’re right! Here, just put your number in my phone, I’ll text you so you will have mine.” He said while handing you his phone. 

As you typed your name and number in, you asked, “I was actually thinking we could meet up at my dorm this Saturday. I was just going to get some pizza and I thought we could all work on the project and eat together.” You handed his phone back as he responded, “That works for me! I will let Shownu know and make sure it is good for him too. I’ll shoot you a text as soon as I know.”

“Awesome!” You exclaimed as you turned to head to your next class. “See you then!”

\----------------

The knock on the door made you jump. You had spent the past 2 hours cleaning your dorm for your visitors. Laura had arrived 30 minutes ago and just enjoyed watching you run around, flustered and anxious. She still tried to calm your nerves through her entertainment. “Y/N, it’s just a project meetup. Not a date. It is okay to take it a little less seriously.” She meant well but her words did nothing to calm your thoughts.

Now, with the object of your anxiousness just behind the door, you took one last glance around the room. Everything was tidier than it had ever been, but it still didn’t feel like enough. With a deep breath to collect yourself, you opened the door.

Shownu’s large frame was standing imposingly in the doorway with Jooheon right behind him. Before you could greet them, Jooheon lifted up the cans he was holding. “I hope it’s okay that we brought beer. It was his idea.” He said while nodding towards Shownu.

“Oh, o-of course.” You said, trying to hide the reluctance in your voice. You had never been much of a drinker and had only planned to eat pizza and study but what damage could a few beers do?

As soon as the pizza arrived, you all sat down to eat and go over the project. A few minutes in, you started on your first beer. It was just as gross as you remembered from your graduation party after high school. The slight malty flavor wasn’t one you normally enjoyed but you noticed, the more you drank, the better it tasted. 

\-----------------

The sun woke you up the next morning. The blinding light pierced through your eyelids and added to the ache in your head. You rolled over and fought to fall back asleep. As you pulled your hands up to your face, you grazed something soft. Your hands stopped on the object as your brain tried to catch up. After a lingering touch, your brain recognized it as foreign.

Your eyes flit open as you sat straight up. There was someone sitting next to your bed with there head gently resting on the side. Before you could clearly look at the their face, nausea hit you like a ton of bricks. You quickly sprang out of bed and towards your open bathroom door. As you were heaving into the toilet you heard your name lightly called from the other room.

“Y/N? You okay?”

You couldn’t respond immediately but as soon as you could catch a breath, you replied,”I’ll be okay.” You took a few more breaths to test your nausea and as soon as you were confident you were done, you turned toward the bathroom door. 

When you saw him, you were simultaneously relieved and embarrassed at the same time. You couldn’t help but sigh a breath in relief that it wasn’t Shownu, but Jooheon watching you puke up your guts. At the same time, you were embarrassed that any one had to see you that way.

Jooheon furrowed his brow in concern as he bent down towards you. You turned your face away from him because you were sure you looked like absolute hell.

“Are you sure you’re okay? Maybe you need to lie back down.” He said while moving closer to examine your face.

You shifted backwards, trying to keep a more comfortable distance between the two of you. “If you give me a minute, I should be fine now that I got it out of my system.” After a moment of not-so-comfortable silence, you continued, “I’m sorry.”

“No Y/N, don’t apologize, I should be apologizing for bringing the beer. I knew we were only here for the project but I tried to make it a little more fun. I’m sorry I did that without asking.” He immediately retorted with remorse on his face.

You half-heartedly smiled back and sneered, “How about with both accept each others apologies and get over it?”

He smirked back and nodded his head in agreement. “Okay.”

After a couple more moments of sitting in awkward silence on your bathroom floor, Jooheon stood and you gladly accepted the hand he extended to help you stand.

As you made your way back into your bedroom, you suddenly remembered the person who was leaning on your bed when you woke up. It didn’t take you long to realize that it must have been Jooheon. 

Your cheeks heated up, just now comprehending that he must have spent the night in your room in order to be here right now. You flipped around and asked abruptly, “What are you doing here?”

Jooheon seemed startled for a moment but not very surprised by the question. His eyes looked away from you and searched for another object to occupy his sight. “Well, after a few beers last night Laura passed out on the couch and you were right behind her. You suddenly got very clingy and kept hanging on Shownu. When we tried to help you to your room, you refused his help. I ended up bringing you in here by myself, and when I tried to leave you wouldn’t let me.” His face slightly reddened while remembering. “You kept grabbing on to my hand and crying that if I left, you would have bad dreams. I decided to stay until you fell asleep, but I guess I fell asleep too.”

You were glad you couldn’t remember any of this, just hearing it from someone else was embarrassing enough. “I don’t remember anything but I am really sorry that I did that. I have been told I am a needy drunk.” You apologized once again.

“It’s all right. I am just glad you could sleep okay.” He looked back towards you and asked again, “Are you sure you are all right?”

Though your raging headache disagreed, you nodded and again assured him that you would be okay. 

“I know that you said it was okay, but you will let me at least get you a coffee for your troubles?”

You saw the hesitance in his face but he reluctantly accepted, “If you really want to. I would argue but you don’t seem like the kind of girl who would take no for an answer.”

After checking on Laura sleeping on the couch in the living room and taking a couple Asprin, you and Jooheon headed to the cafe down the street from your dorm. You knew you both must look like the walking dead but neither of you seemed to particularly care. 

You both walked silently, you trying to let the cool air simmer down your headache, and Jooheon seeming to be distracted by the changing color of the leaves.

With your coffee ordered and you seats taken, you felt the sudden urge to break the silence.

“Jooheon, what is your major?”

He nonchalantly answered, “Music production.”

Your eyes suddenly lit up in interest. “Really? That must be so much fun. I love music but I don’t think I am creative enough to do that.”

“It’s really just having and good ear and a basic understanding of musical theory.”

“I have neither of those.” You retorted. This received a small chuckle in return.

“So what are you majoring in? You must be good at something.” He said sarcastically while showing off those signature dimples. You’d noticed them before, but for the first time, you didn’t want to see them go away.

“I am a space kind of girl myself. That’s why I’m taking Astronomy. I haven’t declared a major yet, but I have a feeling that Astronomy is the one I am going to go with.”

“Space… I’m impressed. That’s really complicated. I am only taking Astronomy for one of my basic science credits. It’s only been two weeks and just thinking about it gives me a headache.” He grabs his forehead while saying this.

You giggle and tell him, “Honestly, it’s not always easy for me either, but it just never ceases to amaze me. There are so many fascinating things going on out there that we can’t explain. For example, did you know that there is a star in the Orion constellation that could explode into a supernova any day? If it happened, the supernova would be so bright that we could see it during the day. My favorite part is that it might have already happened but we can’t see it because the light is still travelling to us.”

You don’t even try to hide your excitement while talking about it. Once you get started on space, it’s hard to stop. You go on to talk about the science behind it. After a couple of minutes of blabbering, you suddenly concerned that you are boring poor Jooheon to death. But when you look at him, him and his dimples seem to be hanging on your every word. You smile and continue.

\------------------

Almost two weeks later, you once again find yourself in your living room surrounded by your project group, this time with no beer. 

Your group had met up a couple more times since your pizza night and this was to be your last meeting before your presentation the next day. You had apologized to Shownu about hanging all over him the first night and he had accepted. You also tried your best to flirt with him every time you met up but you never could seem to act normal around him. You typically knew exactly what you wanted to say but you tended to stumble over your words when talking to him. You hadn’t really gotten as close as you had hoped for on that first day in the cafe.

As you were opening the fridge to grab a water, you heard someone enter the kitchen behind you. “Water?” You asked while turning towards them.

Jooheon shook his head, lightly refusing. “I actually have a questions for you.”

“Sure, what’s up?” You asked.

“The science museum is actually having a special show this weekend in their planetarium. It’s going to be about the Orion constellation.” Jooheon paused for a moment and shifted awkwardly on his feet. “I was wondering, since you really seem to be interested in it, if you wanted to go see it… with me?”

“Of course!” Why in the world would you turn down this opportunity? “How much do you need for my ticket?”

Jooheon seemed slightly thrown by the question, “Oh, nothing! I already bought them so let’s just say that this one is on me.”

You bickered about it for a moment before letting Jooheon have his way.

\-----------------

You had been ready for a while now. You tended to overestimate the amount of time you needed to get ready. This caused you to be lazing around on your couch with your favorite white jumper on, and your makeup done a little bit nicer than your average school day. 

Anxiousness came over you in waves but you weren’t sure why. Of course you were excited about the planetarium and of course you knew you would enjoy it, so what were these butterflies trying to fly around in your stomach?

It had already been ten minutes since Jooheon text you that he was on the way so you were just quietly waiting and letting your thoughts and excitement occupy your mind. You were so lost in thoughts about Orion that the doorbell made you jump. You smoothed out your jumper as you stood up, grabbed your purse, and headed towards the door.

When you opened it, you were greeted by a charming smile, paired with those dimples, which immediately caused you to smile back without thought.

There was something about Jooheon that seemed slightly different. You thought it might be his clothes. Even though he kept his typical street style, something seemed a little bit more put together and sophisticated about it. Then you thought that maybe it was his hair. Rather than falling across his forehead like it normally did, it was swept up over to one side. But the more you looked at him, the more those explanations didn’t seem to be right. Somehow, he just looked a little brighter.

You exchange your normal greetings and promptly headed down towards the bus stop. On the way, Jooheon lamented about not having a car, which you told him was understandable for a college student and that you didn’t have one either.

After you had taken your seats on the bus, your conversation once again turned to Jooheon’s major.

“Okay, so I get that you like music but have you had the chance to make any of your own yet?”

“I’ve actually been making my own for years.” He said with a small look over to you to gauge your reaction.

“Really? Why haven’t you already shown it to me?” You asked, slight disappointment in your voice.

“It’s kind of embarrassing to show to other people.” He gazed out of the window, ”I really want everything to be perfect, but then I always think that no one other than me will like it.”

“Jooheon!” The sharpness in your voice cause him to turn his head back to you. You took the opportunity to make sincere eye contact with him. “I know that if it is your music, it has to be amazing.”

He held your gaze for a couple more second before looking down with reddening cheeks, “But you have never heard it, how would you know that?”

“Then let me.” You paused for a response but he just kept his head down. “I am serious. I know if you are as big of a music nerd as you make yourself out to be, you have it on your phone right now.”

He couldn’t argue with your logic at all. Wordlessly, he pulled out his phone and earphones and placed one in his ear. He passed the free one over to you so that you could do the same. After a visible moment of reluctance, he hit play.

\-----------------

The two of you had arrived at the planetarium earlier than expected. You had no problem with it though as it gave you plenty of time to continue your conversation about Jooheon’s music.

“I wouldn’t lie to you!” You told him desperately as you took your seats, “That was some of the most unbelievable music I have ever listened to and it didn’t even have lyrics! How did you even do that thing with the synth noise?”

“You really want to know?” He asked hesitantly. You fervently nodded your head.

He went on to explain some of the basics of creating the song with a gleam in his eye. You could see how much he really loved music and how much more he loved making it. You suddenly found yourself wondering what he looked like when he was working on it. Did he have this same child-like look in his eye or did he get serious with a thoughtful crease in his brow. Maybe he flashed those dimples whenever he found a beat that he really liked. You really wanted to see all of it.

Before you knew it, your conversation halted because of the dimming lights and the announcement that the show was starting. All throughout the show, you couldn’t help but quietly explain certain things to Jooheon in more detail as the synthetic stars twinkled above you. When you finally tore your eyes away for a moment to see how Jooheon was doing, you found yourself immediately caught in his gaze. There was something in the way he was looking at you that made you linger there. Maybe it was the suddenly apparent closeness of your faces. Maybe it was the tightening in your chest. Or maybe it was the way the manufactured stars reflected in his eyes.

“Y/N.” He whispered so quietly you almost couldn’t hear it. You used it as an excuse to move a little closer.

“I need to tell you something,” He looked down at your lips. “I lik-”

Your moment was suddenly cut off by bright lights suddenly coming on. Both of your looked around, blinking, waiting for your eyes to adjust. It seemed that while you were distracted, the planetarium show had ended.

\-------------------

The next school week flew by and before you knew it, it was the weekend once more. You and Jooheon had kept in contact all week and talked everyday about music, astronomy, and your lives. You weren’t quite sure what was happened between the two of you but you knew you didn’t hate it. As an excuse to see him, you asked the whole project group to come over once again, but this time just to hang out and have a good time.

Once more your found your living room messy with pizza boxes and beer cans. This time, you had made sure to slow yourself down and drink plenty of water. While Laura was ranting about her annoying math professor, you excused yourself to the restroom.

Almost as soon as you stepped out of the bathroom door, you ran into a wall. On second glance, it wasn’t a wall but Shownu. Your cheeks immediately heated up at the close distance between you, but Shownu didn’t step back.

“Y/N.” He stated with his thoughtful voice.

The sound of him saying your name, combined with the close quarters of your hallway and the alcohol coursing through you made your body shiver. Without waiting for a response, he continued.

“You like me right?”

The suddenness of the question made you trip backwards into the wall. “Um, u-uh,” you stammered over your words for a moment but he patiently waited for your answer.

“Yes?” You couldn’t help but notice the question in your answer.

He looked at you for a moment longer before taking a step closer, causing the distance between you to be next-to-nothing. “Then, will you go out with me?”

What? Had all your flirting actually gotten through to him? Had this moment actually come?

“Go out with you?” You repeated his question back to him in order to buy some time to process what was going on.

Shownu leaned closer, removing any distance you had between you before. You could feel his breathe on your ear as he repeated, “Yes, go out with me.”

For a moment, you stayed just like that. Close enough to kiss with just one word from you. Your eyes found his perfectly pouty lips as you opened your own to respond.

“Hey Shownu, what’s taking you so long to-”

You pushed Shownu away but it was already too late. As soon as your saw Jooheon’s face, you knew you had screwed up. His eyes were opened wide and his brow was furrowed in confusion.

“What is this?” He asked quietly. When neither of you responded he asked louder, “What is this?!”

“It’s not wh-” You were cut off by Shownu’s voice.

“I was asking Y/N out.” He stated matter-of-factly.

Jooheon looked at you to see if he was telling the truth. You looked away to avoid the expression on his face. It didn’t take long to hear his footsteps move away swiftly and the front door slam behind him.

When you finally looked up at Shownu, he looked as confused as you had ever seen him.

“No.” You softly said, your voice barely above a whisper, “I am really sorry, but I can’t date you.”

You weren’t quite sure when it had happened, but you knew that in these past few weeks, your view of your ideal man had changed. No longer was it the strong and thoughtful type. The toothy smile and lean muscles just weren’t doing it for you anymore. Now, when you closed your eyes and thought of the perfect man, he didn’t look anything like the one standing before you. The man you thought of had an eye smile to kill for. His dimples were out of this world and his ambition was beyond compare. He laughed carelessly and smiled boldy.

\---------------------

It had been two weeks. Two weeks without even a text. You hadn’t seen him in class and he ignored your calls. You were at a loss. Even Laura joined in on the effort but it seemed like Jooheon had dropped off the face of the earth. You had one last option.

One day, you stopped Shownu after class. You hadn’t talked much since you rejected him, but he didn’t seemed to fazed by it.

“Have you heard from Jooheon?”

“Yeah, we actually just talked last night.” He said with a hint of interest in his voice, “Why?”

“Well.” You paused to think,” I just needed to get him some notes since he has been missing but he hasn’t gotten back to me.”

“Oh.” He responds, “Do you want me to take them for you?”

“No!” You say immediately, “I really need to explain a couple of things to him, so could you have him text me please?”

“Yeah, no problem.” He says, seeming to easily accept your explanation.

“Thank you!” You say as you start to walk off, ”You’re a real lifesaver!”

If this didn’t work, you weren’t sure what would.

\------------------

That night, you almost couldn’t believe your eyes when you saw Jooheon’s name light up on your phone. You didn’t hesitate in answering.

“Jooheon! Where have you been? I was worried when you weren’t showing up to class. Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he said, not seeming very interested in giving an explanation. “Can you do something for me?”

“Anything.” You immediately answered.

“Come to my place. I have something to show you.”

\------------------

The walk wasn’t far and you were at Jooheon’s front door within ten minutes. When he opened the door, relief flooded over you at the sight of his face. He seemed okay and well rested. The only thing that was missing was that charming smile and those signature dimples.

After he waved you in, you noticed his dorm was exactly what you expected it to look like. Pretty bare with mostly just necessities. Some shoes and clothes strewn about but not much else. He offered you a water and your politely declined. You quietly followed him into his room.

While his living room was bare, his bedroom was anything but. The amount of technology piled on his desk and shelves surprised you. Normally, you would immediately comment and start asking questions, but right now you were mostly concerned with the sullen look on Jooheon’s face.

“Sit.” He said as he pulled out his chair from his desk. You sat down and let Jooheon place his large headphones on your head. You watch as he clicked a few buttons on his computer. Just as you were about to ask what was going on, the music started.

The rhythm was slow. It seemed unlike the other music he had played for you on the bus, but somehow it was also intrinsically his. When you looked up at him, he seemed to be searching your face for a reaction. The moment your eyes met his, you heard his voice. You were puzzled for a moment because his mouth didn’t seem to be moving. It only took you a moment to realize that it was the song.

His rap somehow stood out but blended with the music so perfectly. Like they had been made to meld with one another in perfect harmony. He continued to search your face as you listened to his words.

All of the happiness and pain he had poured into the music flowed into you. With not so direct words, he was telling you how he felt. You didn’t need any explanation to know.

All too soon, the song ended and you found yourself still staring into Jooheon’s eyes in the silence of his still room. You removed the headphones and open your mouth to speak but before you can say anything, Jooheon starts, “Listen to me before you say anything.” You quietly nod your head for him to continue. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have ignored you these past two weeks. I had a lot on my mind and for some reason, I thought holing myself up in here and making music the right thing to do. I thought that if I pretended that you didn’t exist, it would hurt less but I kept finding that the only thing that I could think about when producing, was you.” You tried once again to interrupt but he continued.

“Shownu told me what happened. He told me that he came onto you and that you rejected him. I just thought that there was no way that you could turn him down. The first night we studied at your apartment, you mumbled about his smile until you fell asleep. I thought there was no way I could compare. I still don’t know if I can but I do know one thing. No matter what, I need to let you know how much I like you.” He stopped talking but continued in his unwavering eye contact.

“My turn?” You asked. He nodded.

You wasted no time in connecting your lips with his. He jumped at the sudden contact but quickly reciprocated your movement with his own.

You pulled away after a few moments to say, “I like you too.” and then immediately dove back in.

**Author's Note:**

> My first fanfic on Archive! I really hope you enjoyed.


End file.
